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How to Stop Thinking About Your Therapy Clients
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby is a licensed psychologist, licensed marriage and family therapist, board-certified coach, AAMFT clinical supervisor, host of the Love, Happiness, and Success Podcast and founder of Growing Self.
I want to talk about a topic that’s particularly close to my heart — how we, as therapists, can lovingly close the loop after a session with our clients and STOP THINKING ABOUT THEM!
It’s a testament to the depth of our care and commitment that we often find ourselves thinking about our clients’ problems and wellbeing even after the session has ended. While this reflects our genuine concern and responsibility toward the people we serve, it’s also important to recognize the need to gently redirect our minds for our own wellbeing. We deserve to have healthy boundaries and to unplug at the end of the day when our work is done. This helps us, our clients, and ultimately, it may even keep us in the profession long-term, rather than leading to a situation where we become burned out and overwhelmed.
Of course, it can be easier said than done to stop thinking about your therapy clients! So, these are some strategies that have helped me and my colleagues at Growing Self Counseling and Coaching, where the wellbeing of therapists is our top priority. I hope they’ll help you, too.
If you’d prefer to listen to this one, I’ve also recorded a podcast episode on this topic. You can find it on this page, or on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.
1. Understanding the ‘Why’
This is because we feel a deep sense of responsibility toward our clients, and the plethora of options and outcomes can sometimes leave us without a definitive plan for helping them. So our mind stays hard at work, when the best thing for us — and ultimately for them — would be to take a breather.
Having empathy, compassion, and a desire to make a positive impact in the lives of others is at the core of being a therapist. It’s only natural that we take our work to heart. However, when the session ends and we find ourselves in an ambiguous situation, our minds may continue to race with all of the possibilities and uncertainties.
2. The Power of a Clear Model
This is where the importance of having a clear model comes into play. A therapeutic model acts as a guiding framework, helping us navigate through the complexities of our clients’ experiences and our own responses to them. If you find yourself frequently mulling over your sessions, it might be an indicator that it’s time to look closely at your model, or become more grounded in one if you haven’t already.
3. Writing it Down: Case Conceptualization and Planning
Taking the time to write down your case conceptualization can be a game-changer when you’re feeling stuck. It’s a process that allows you to lay out your thoughts, understandings, and hypotheses about the client’s situation in a structured manner, which you can walk away from and then follow up with a clear and concise plan. Putting your case conceptualization in writing not only provides a tangible reference for future sessions, but also helps in mentally closing the loop, giving your mind permission to rest.
4. Mastering the Art of Mental Redirection
Not being able to turn off your brain is a challenge many therapists face, and it’s one of the biggest contributors to burnout in our profession. Learning the art of mental redirection is crucial. This could mean engaging in activities that bring you joy, practicing mindfulness, or simply allowing yourself a moment of quiet reflection.
5. Growth Opportunities
While it’s vital to learn how to stop the post-session mental churn, it’s also important to recognize that these moments of reflection can be valuable growth opportunities. They encourage us to constantly learn, evolve, and become better versions of ourselves, both for our clients and us.
And the reverse is also true: Seeking out growth opportunities so that you feel that you’re practicing your craft at your highest and best potential will help you ruminate about how you’re working with your clients less often outside of sessions. Seeking out professional trainings and certifications, reading career advice for therapists and listening to industry podcasts are all ways to maintain your edge.
6. Consider Your Context
Finally, I want to validate something that’s very real for therapists, and that needs to be addressed if it’s becoming an issue in your career: the culture where you’re doing your work, and whether it allows you to unplug and have a personal life outside of your working hours.
Many early-career therapists end up working in agency environments with high-needs populations and unreasonable caseloads that literally keep them up at night. These environments can wear therapists out before their careers have even begun. Unfortunately, solo private practice can present its own headaches that make it difficult to put work aside at the end of a long day.
If you think your work environment is preventing you from having balance, consider other possibilities. Many group private practice opportunities offer access to higher-functioning clients, fewer non-billable hours, and more manageable caseloads.
How to Stop Thinking about Your Therapy Clients
In wrapping up, dear friends, remember that caring for our clients is a beautiful part of our journey as therapists. However, caring for ourselves with the same intensity is equally important, and learning when and how to stop thinking about your therapy clients is an essential part of self-care. By closing the mental loop and mastering mental redirection, we can ensure that we are giving our best to our clients while nurturing our own minds and spirits.
Here’s to finding balance, growth, and serenity in our journey of caring and healing.
Ready to Grow Your Career?
If you’re feeling ready to explore even more, check out my free resource: The Licensed Certified Coach 2-Part Video Training: “The Ultimate Guide”. This training is designed to help you get clear on your professional path and explore whether coaching could be a fulfilling addition to your career.
Also, let’s connect on LinkedIn! I’d love to hear about the strategies you implement to stop thinking about your therapy clients.
To the light,
P.S. — I have many more articles and podcast episodes for you in my content collection for therapists. I hope you’ll check it out, they’re all there for you!