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Your Relationship’s Strengths

This assessment measured your relationship’s health in the following key areas:

  • Emotional Safety
  • Communication
  • Teamwork
  • Kindness and Generosity
  • Shared Goals and Values
  • The Presence or Absence of Negative Behaviors

Your answers provide insight into the strengths of your relationship, as well as your growth opportunities.

Real Support For Your Relationship

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby is the founder and clinical director of Growing Self Counseling and Coaching. She is licensed as both a marriage and family therapist and a psychologist, and she is a board certified life coach. She is the host of “The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast,” the author of “Exaholics: Breaking Your Addiction to Your Ex Love,” and a frequent contributor to national health, wellness and news publications.

Check your email for your quiz results! Dr. Bobby will be reviewing your scores with you, explaining what they mean, and sharing her top tips for creating positive change in the videos below.

Emotional Safety

Emotional Safety is the foundation of every relationship. Feeling loved, respected, secure and fundamentally accepted by your partner is a necessity for having a strong relationship. If couples have a strong sense of mutual trust and love, they can often transcend other obstacles. Conversely, if their foundation of emotional safety is shakey they’ll often have problems in other domains of their relationship as a result, like communication or teamwork.

Discover what your results mean about the levels of emotional safety in your relationship, and get Dr. Bobby’s recommendations for strengthening this area of your partnership.


    Good communication (C) is essential to having a good relationship. Why? All couples have things that come up that they need to work through: Misunderstandings, problems they need to solve together, and learning about each other’s thoughts and feelings are all vital to having a healthy partnership.

    Discover what your results in this area mean, and get Dr. Bobby’s recommendations for how to improve your communication.


    In addition to enjoying each other, every couple in a long-term relationship needs to learn how to work together as a team (T). While maintaining a household, parenting, and attending to daily tasks of life may seem hum-drum, these are crucial aspects of any successful partnership. When couples have significantly different ideas about what needs to be done, and who should do what (and when!) conflict will arise.

    Learn what your results mean, and get Dr. Bobby’s recommendations on some strategies that will help you improve your teamwork.


      Kindness and Generosity

      Did you know that research into what makes happy, healthy, enduring relationships consistently finds is that two things are more important than almost anything else? The magic ingredients are kindness and generosity. Being kind towards each other means acting in ways that are loving, affectionate and friendly. Being generous with each other means making each other’s feelings and preferences a priority, at least some of the time. When two people are intentionally showing each other love and affection, and being thoughtful about each other’s feelings, their relationship will flourish.

      Learn what your responses in this section indicate about your relationship, and get Dr. Bobby’s tips for how to strengthen your partnership in this area.

      Shared Goals and Values

      In a healthy, dyamic partnership the shared vision, shared goals, and shared life that a couple works toward together creates a mutual sense of meaning and purpose. Going through life as a united “we” not only strengthens a partnership and a family, but can generate optimism, commitment, and deep connection.

      Whether the cornerstone of your partnership is raising a family, building a business, practicing your faith, or expanding your horizons through your next great adventure, having common goals for your shared life (plus deep respect and support for each other’s individual goals) is a foundational strength for any relationship.

      Learn what your “Shared Goals and Values” score means about your relationship, and get Dr. Bobby’s tips for how to make positive changes in this domain.


      Your Relationship’s
      Overall Health

      The presence or relative absence of a few, specific “negative relationship behaviors” are highly significant. If your relationship is currently experiencing a high degree of negative behaviors, it’s a warning sign.

      Get Dr. Bobby’s tips and heartfelt advice for how to make positive changes in your relationship in this very important area.

      Real Help For Your Relationship

      We’ve helped thousands of couples heal their relationships through our style of positive, powerful, and evidence-based couples therapy.

      We’d like to help you, too.

      “It has been really helpful to have someone else’s perspectives and guidance on our conversations, and Kathleen has been incredibly easy to talk with. I’m surprised at how comfortable this experience has been for both of us so far.”

      — Former Clients

      “We both really like Brenda’s style. She makes us feel comfortable. We have been able to share things frankly with each other through her prompts and understanding way.”

      — Former Clients

      “We have tried working with other marriage counselors before but this feels way more productive. I love it that our marriage counselor gives us worksheets and homework assignments to do between our sessions.”

      — Former Client



      Meet a Few Of Our Relationship Experts

      The marriage counselors, couples therapists and premarital counselors of Growing Self have specialized training and years of experience in helping couples reconnect. We use only evidence based strategies that have been proven by research to help you restore your strong bond, and love your relationship again.




      Hunter Tolman

      Hunter Tolman

      M.S., MFTC



      Hunter is an exceptionally warm, compassionate couples counselor and therapist who has specialized training in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy as well as family systems. He helps individuals gain self-awareness and move past self-limiting patterns, and helps couples achieve deeper levels of communication, connection, and commitment. He can help you both to understand yourselves, and each other, so that you can create new, positive ways of relating that heal your bond.



      Amy-Noelle Shih

      Amy-Noelle Shih

      M.A., LPC


      Amy-Noelle specializes in relationship dynamics and personal development, and has over 10 years of clinical experience in helping individuals and couples grow into the fullness of their potential. She uses the Gottman Method and also draws from Ester Perel’s work, which integrates psychodynamic, attachment, and systemic theories, as well as body-oriented and mindful therapy approaches to help you both create transformational change in yourselves and in your relationship.

      Amanda Schaeffer

      Amanda Schaeffer

      M.S., MFTC



      Amanda is a Marriage Counselor, Premarital Counselor and Family Therapist with a warm, gentle style that will help you both feel comfortable, respected, and understood. She has a gift for helping couples and families understand each other compassionately, feel emotionally safe, and learn how to relate in positive new ways that allow them to start enjoying each other again.



      Teresa Thomas

      Teresa Thomas



      Teresa Thomas is a marriage counselor and couples therapist with years of experience in helping couples communicate more effectively, find new solutions to old problems, repair their strong bond, rebuild trust after affairs, successfully blend families, improve their sexual intimacy, and parent joyfully together. She is a couples therapist and parenting coach with a positive, solution focused style who specializes in helping you both make positive changes to your life, as well as to your relationship.


      Meagan Terry

      Meagan Terry

      M.A., LMFT

      Meagan Terry is a relationship specialist. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over nine years of experience in helping couples reconnect, and enjoy each other again. She uses effective, evidence based forms of marriage counseling including Emotionally-Focused Couples Therapy and The Gottman Method. In addition to working one-on-one with couples, she teaches our Lifetime of Love premarital and relationship class.

      Seth Bender

      Seth Bender

      M. A., LMFTC

      Seth Bender is a marriage and family therapist with specialized training and experience in helping couples heal their relationships, improve communication, release resentments, and achieve new levels of enjoyment and fulfillment with each other. He practices Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy to help you strengthen your bond, as well as positive, empowering and solution focused coaching strategies to help you both take positive action in your relationship.  

      Anastacia Sams

      Anastacia Sams

      M.A., N.C.C., LMFT-C

      Anastacia's authentic, caring approach to marriage counseling and relationship coaching helps couples find each other's "noble intentions," and re-commit to showing each other love and respect. She can help you heal old hurts, improve your communication, restore trust, and work together as a team.

      Dori Bagi

      Dori Bagi

      M. S., ASORC

      Dori is a kind, empathetic couples counselor, individual therapist, and life coach who specializes in sex therapy, and helping couples create healthy emotional and sexual intimacy. Her friendly style makes it safe to talk about anything, and her solution-focused approach helps you move past the past, and into a bright new future of intimacy and connection.

      Polly Drew

      Polly Drew

      M.Ed., LMFT

      Polly is a marriage counselor with over 25 years of experience in helping couples "come back from the brink," heal their strong bond, and enter into a positive and satisfying new chapter of life together. Her warm, competent style will put you both at ease and help you find new solutions to old problems.

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