The Pain of Heartbreak is Very Real
(Excerpted from a recent guest-post on intent.com)
As anyone who has struggled in the aftermath of a traumatic breakup knows, there is a literal pain that comes with the loss of a relationship: a sharp, palpable pain that most people feel at the point that their lower ribs connect. It’s a pulsing, weepy pain that digs into your diaphragm, and takes your breath away. It’s a pain that defies distraction, repels food, and throbs even through sleep.
The pain, the literal, physical pain, is just as real as that of any other injury like a broken arm, or a deep wound requiring stitches. Only this pain is in a place that no physician can touch. There is no pill, and no prognosis. Just an ache that feels like it will last forever.
For many broken-hearted people, this physical pain is one of the worst parts of going through a bad break up or divorce. For one thing, it scares them. They can’t make it go away, so they wonder when it will ever stop, or whether they will ever feel better.
Furthermore, maddeningly, it feels like contact with their Ex is like the only thing that will stop the hurting. This is true even if they know intellectually that the relationship with their Ex is toxic, and any contact will only bring more pain in the end. They still crave the temporary relief it might bring.
If you are in this aching, confusing place here are some tips to help you get through it… (Read the rest of this article on Intent.com: How to Get Through The Pain of a Breakup.)
I hope the breakup advice in that article helps you.
I also hope that you know you’re not alone in this, because breakups can be incredibly isolating as well as painful. I know from my own experience, as well as my work with clients, that losing a love is one of the hardest things that you can go through. I have so much compassion for what you’re feeling, and I want to help. There is tons of information available to you in the free articles and podcasts I’ve done on the subject, or you can check out my book, “Exaholics: Breaking Your Addiction to an Ex Love.” If you’d like even more support in getting over the pain of a breakup or divorce, healing your broken heart, and putting your life back together, you might also check out my breakup recovery program.
Although time alone won’t heal this, your positive action will. Just the fact that you’re looking for information is a sign that you’re on the path to healing. Even though it feels like the pain will never end, if you do the work, it will. I wish you all the best on your journey through healing and growth.