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Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby is a licensed psychologist, licensed marriage and family therapist, board-certified coach, AAMFT clinical supervisor, host of the Love, Happiness, and Success Podcast and founder of Growing Self.
What if your biggest obstacle isn’t laziness, lack of motivation, or bad luck—but one of those sneaky, common bad habits that quietly run your life? You know the ones. The things you keep going back to when you’re stressed, overwhelmed, or just plain exhausted. Maybe it’s a glass (or three) of wine. Maybe it’s endless scrolling on Instagram until your eyeballs dry out. Maybe it’s the frantic, gotta-do-it-all energy of your to-do list. (Been there even as a therapist!)
We all have our “fix,” that thing we reach for when life feels like too much. But here’s the truth: these habits aren’t random. They’re coping strategies in disguise—and often, they’re the very reason we feel stuck, burnt out, or like we’re living on autopilot.
In a recent episode of the Love, Happiness and Success podcast, I sat down with the incredible Ian Morgan Cron—author, psychotherapist, and Enneagram teacher—to talk about his newest book The Fix. Ian pulls back the curtain on what “fixes” really are and how we can break free from the sneaky habits that quietly hijack our lives.
List of Bad Habits
Let’s start by digging into a list of bad habits. It could be…
- Overwork
- People pleasing
- Perfectionism
- Controlling everything and everyone
- A toxic relationship
- Shopping, social media, food, gambling, you name it.
This is just a short list of bad habits. It could be anything that shows up as a quick comfort we reach for when we’re anxious, sad, lonely, or bored. But over time, those habits take a toll. They rob us of our clarity, energy, and sense of control. They keep us stuck.
Why It’s Not Really About the Common Bad Habits
Here’s the kicker (and Ian said this beautifully): the habit itself isn’t the problem—it’s the solution. Wait, what?
Yep. That common bad habit is a response to something deeper. It’s your brain’s attempt to soothe discomfort or avoid pain. But if the “solution” is making your life worse—wrecking your confidence, health, relationships, or career—it’s time for a different path.
When we cling to the illusion of control (“I can quit anytime I want!”… said every Netflix-binger ever), we stay stuck. But when we finally say, “I’m out of ammo,” it opens the door to something beautiful: surrender, healing, and actual transformation.
(If this topic is lighting you up, you might also like my articles on Stopping Self-Sabotage and Moving Forward: The Path of Personal Growth.)
Feeling stuck? Take my FREE quiz to find out what’s holding you back!
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