Has your self esteem been shattered by your breakup or divorce? Here's what's going on, and five steps to help you regain your confidence again.
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby is the founder and clinical director of Growing Self Counseling and Coaching. She's the author of “Exaholics: Breaking Your Addiction to Your Ex Love,” and the host of The Love, Happiness & Success Podcast.
As a marriage counselor and couples therapist, I know that relationships can be confusing sometimes, and lots of people have relationship questions. We have listeners of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast and readers of our blog get in touch frequently asking questions about how they can connect with their partners, improve their communication, or create positive change in their marriages. (As well as asking questions about how to grow personally, or create positive changes in different areas of their life). But today's podcast is all about relationships – specifically, your relationship questions.
Your Relationship Questions, Answered.
Today, we're answering your relationship questions in order to give you some direction, and real help for your relationship. Here are some of the relationship questions I'm answering today:
“How do I know whether my relationship is worth saving, or if I should let this go and move on?”
- We discussed signs of a healthy, normal relationship, how to tell if a relationship can be fixed or not, what a committed relationship looks like, as well as warning signs that a relationship is probably not going to work out. We also talked about whether or not you're settling in a relationship. Here are links to some of the resources I referenced: How to Recover From Infidelity, Repairing Your Self Esteem After a Breakup, Are You Addicted to a Toxic Relationship, and breakup-recovery.com.
“Should I stay friends with my Ex?”
- We discussed the pros and cons of staying friends with your Ex, and how to decide whether or not you should. We also talked about how to cut the cord with your Ex, if the time is right. A resource shared was, “Exaholics: Breaking Your Addiction to an Ex Love”
“I'm shutting down with my partner. How do I stop?”
- We talked about the different reasons that someone might have trouble dealing with conflict in relationships, and reasons why people might shut down and withdraw in relationships (as well as the path to repairing them). Resources mentioned included, How to Communicate With Someone Who Won't Talk, Self-Awareness and Self-Discovery: The Path to Personal Growth, Creating Self Confidence, and Communication Problems And How To Fix Them
“I'm afraid that my boyfriend is emotionally unavailable due to his own issues. What do I do?”
- We talked about the realities of having a partner with unaddressed emotional issues, and who is not interested in working on themselves. We discussed her points of power, and her opportunities for changing the situation, as well as how to move forward with a partner who is unwilling. Resources mentioned included, What to Do When Your Partner Has a Problem.
Do you have relationship advice for these questioners or personal experiences that you can relate? Perhaps you have your own relationship questions, self-improvement questions, breakup questions, or career questions for an upcoming episode of The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast? If so, please leave them in the comments!
All the best,
P.S. Pro Tip: One very simple, low key way to start making positive changes in your relationship today is to get your partner to listen to this podcast episode with you. (Yes! Trap them in the car!) Joking aside, listening to relationship advice like that offered here can stimulate productive conversations and lead to growth. Try it and let me know what happens! LMB
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Relationship Advice: Listener's Relationship Questions, Answered
Music Credits: Harry Nilsson, “Jump Into The Fire”
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Meet a Few Of Our Relationship Experts
The marriage counselors, couples therapists and premarital counselors of Growing Self have specialized training and years of experience in helping couples reconnect. We use only evidence based strategies that have been proven by research to help you restore your strong bond, and love your relationship again.
Natalie is an experienced marriage counselor and couples therapist with a master's degree in marriage and family therapy, and years of experience in helping couples communicate more effectively, find new solutions to old problems, repair their strong bond, rebuild trust after affairs, successfully blend families, improve their sexual intimacy, and parent joyfully together. She is a couples therapist and parenting coach with a positive, solution focused style who specializes in helping you both make positive changes to your life, as well as to your relationship. Natalie licensed as a marriage counselor in Maryland, and works with couples around the world as a relationship coach online.
Meagan Terry is a relationship specialist. She is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over nine years of experience in helping couples reconnect, and enjoy each other again. She specializes in Denver marriage counseling, Denver premarital counseling, and online relationship coaching.
Meagan uses effective, evidence based forms of marriage counseling including Emotionally-Focused Couples Therapy and The Gottman Method. In addition to working one-on-one with couples, she teaches our Lifetime of Love premarital and relationship class. Meagan is available to meet with you for marriage counseling or couples therapy in Denver, and for relationship coaching and premarital counseling online.
M.A., N.C.C., LMFT-C
I’m Anastacia Sams: a licensed therapist, life coach, and marriage counselor who is all about helping you create the very best life for yourself and for your relationships. I specialize in a type of evidence-based marriage counseling called Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, that helps you rebuild your secure, strong bond.
I’ve been told that my warm, gentle style immediately sets people at ease. Working with me, you’ll feel safe, cared for, and understood. And through that non-judgmental understanding, you will heal, grow, and — most importantly — understand yourself.”
Dr. Georgiana is a couples counselor and relationship coach with a "tough love" style. Her no-nonsense approach and direct feedback can help you get clarity about what's creating issues in your relationship, develop emotional intelligence skills, change the way you interact with each other, and negotiate your differences in order to build bridges to the center.
Dr. Georgiana is a certified coach as well as a licensed as a marriage and family therapist in California but she specializes in online relationship coaching. She divides her time between San Francisco and Buenos Aires. She is fluent in English, Spanish and French.
M. A., MMFT
Parsa is an experienced couples therapist and relationship coach with a positive but direct style. Working with him will help you quickly get down to business, highlighting the strengths of your relationship as well as the specific things you can both do to help each other feel genuinely loved and respected, each and every day.
Parsa is a fun, easy-to-talk to marriage counselor and relationship coach who's focused on pragmatic results. He can help you create new healthy patterns, express greater empathy, communicate effectively, and nourish the love between you and your partner.
Hunter is a warm, compassionate marriage counselor, couples therapist, and parenting coach who believes in love, and that strong marriages create strong families. He practices Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, which is an evidence-based form of marriage counseling that focuses on helping you create a strong, secure attachment built on trust and empathy.
His gentle, but effective approach can help you open up with each other, and have healing conversations that repair your bond and allow you both to consistently show each other the love and respect you both deserve. Hunter's roots are in Utah, but he is currently based in Colorado. He can serve you as a couples therapist or marriage counselor in Fort Collins, CO and Broomfield, CO, and he provides online marriage counseling & relationship coaching to couples across the US and around the world.