You Were Born To Love.
Nature built you to attach deeply to another person; that’s why healing your marriage bond is so important. When your marriage or relationship is in distress, it affects everything. It’s hard to focus, it’s hard to sleep, and life feels more difficult. When you get upset, it’s harder to calm down. Things feel more overwhelming, and scarier when your marriage bond and secure attachment are disrupted.
That’s not just true for you — it’s true for everyone.
Research has shown that, just like babies and small children, adults have very real needs for secure attachment to their “irreplaceable other.” When these marriage bonds or attachment bonds are threatened, adults are impacted physically: blood pressure goes up, respiration patterns change, sleep is disrupted, and you don’t function as well mentally and physically.
This isn’t just true if you’re fighting. It’s true anytime you’re feeling disconnected…shut out…or unloved.
Attachment Theory and Secure Attachment
The presence of a secure connection is soothing. It strengthens us. It also makes us feel more able to cope with challenges and stressful situations.
Dr. Susan Johnson, the founder of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (which research has shown to be the most effective kind of couples counseling), recently conducted a fascinating new study. She was able to demonstrate — actually measure — not just the power that love and secure attachment has on us physically, but how effective marriage counseling can repair those bonds.
She showed how people perceive the world emotionally and physically as a safer, more manageable place when they feel securely attached to their number one person. Most importantly, she demonstrated the healing power of marriage counseling through attachment-focused marriage counseling.
Watch Dr. Johnson’s video “Soothing The Threatened Brain,” and see the physical power of secure love:
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby is the founder and clinical director of Growing Self. She is a licensed psychologist, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and a board-certified coach, as well as the author of “Exaholics: Breaking Your Addiction to Your Ex Love,” and the host of The Love, Happiness & Success Podcast.
Marriage Counseling Questions | Couples Therapy Questions
If you’re considering getting involved in marriage counseling, couples therapy, or relationship coaching you probably have questions! Get your marriage counseling questions answered, right here.
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Our relationship experts have tons of free, helpful relationship advice on numerous topics to support you both on your journey of growth together. View our relationship advice.
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When To Get Marriage Counseling?
Was that just a yucky fight? Or is your relationship really in trouble? Here’s how to tell when to get marriage counseling.
What To Expect From Marriage Counseling
Learn what to expect from marriage counseling, from your first free consultation to the triumphant “graduation” from couples therapy.
Relationship Coaching vs. Couples Therapy
What’s the difference between relationship coaching vs couples therapy? Learn about both approaches, and which is right for you.
How to Find a Marriage Counselor
Not all marriage counselors are the same. Getting involved with a bad one can be a disaster. Here’s how to find a good marriage counselor…
Pre Marriage Counseling
Couples counseling before marriage is not the same thing as premarital counseling. Many couples need to grow together before they can move forward.
How Long Does Marriage Counseling Take?
You shouldn’t be in marriage counseling for years. Learn the average length of marriage counseling, depending on your situation, and your relationship goals.
How Marriage Counseling Works
Marriage counseling works, but how? Learn how marriage counseling works, and how the process can help you grow, together.
Does Couples Therapy Work?
Couples who successfully work through rough patches come out stronger than ever before. If you’re wondering, “Does couples therapy work?” read this article for the inside scoop.
Can We Do Marriage Counseling Online?
Online marriage counseling can be incredibly convenient and effective — but not always. Learn when online marriage counseling is the best bet, and when it’s a bad idea…
Can You Do Long-Distance Couples Therapy?
Yes, we provide long-distance couples counseling from all over the world through secure, easy, three-way online video.
Does Insurance Cover Marriage Counseling?
Insurance can pay for marriage counseling (aka, family therapy), but only sometimes. Learn when insurance covers marriage counseling, and when it won’t.
How Much is Marriage Counseling?
Getting expert help for your marriage can be the best, most life-changing decision you ever make. How much do couples therapy and marriage counseling cost? Get all the details, here.
Gift Relationship Help
If you have a loved one who is struggling in their relationship, you can help them get help by “gifting” couples counseling or coaching. Here’s how…
Discernment Counseling For Couples
Before marriage counseling can work, both partners need to want it to work. Discernment counseling helps you resolve ambivalence, and get clarity.
Why Evidence-Based Therapy Matters
Marriage counseling can be a huge waste of time if your counselor doesn’t practice evidence-based approaches to marriage counseling. Here’s why…
Online Couples Therapy
We offer Denver couples therapy and Denver marriage counseling as well as online couples therapy. Learn about our online couples therapy services.
Our Relationship Services
We offer premarital counseling, sex therapy, perinatal counseling, parent coaching, affair recovery, blended family counseling, financial therapy for couples, and more. Learn about all our couples counseling services.
Meet Our Relationship Experts
Growing Self relationship experts are marriage and family therapists with specialized training and experience in effective, evidence-based approaches to help couples grow, together. Meet our team of relationship experts…
The Best Marriage Counseling
Curious to hear what others have to say about their experience with “the best marriage counselor?” Read their stories…
Free Resources, For You.
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