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Premarital Counseling For a Lifetime of Love



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Premarital Counseling For a Lifetime of Love

Denver • Broomfield • DTC • Online Across the Us & Internationally

Premarital Counseling Questions: Can You Do “Non-Religious” or Secular Premarital Counseling?

By Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, Founder of Growing Self Counseling & Coaching

Yes, however many couples don’t realize that there are more options for premarital counseling than the ones offered through their church or synagogue. Furthermore, more and more couples are electing to have their marriages outside of a religious institution altogether. They’re writing their own vows, and eschewing the cathedral for the beach. As a result, they aren’t required to go through any type of premarital counseling in order to tie the knot. Sadly, many of them don’t realize the importance of premarital counseling, and don’t make it a priority.

But even couples who do “traditional” premarital counseling through their church or other religious institution may not get the type of premarital counseling that teaches them how to have a great relationship, and gives them a tool kit of skills and strategies to use in the future. This is because, while some large churches have structured premarital counseling programs that can be really good, most don’t. Most religious-oriented “premarital counseling” consists of a couple of meetings with a clergy-person.

What actually happens in these religious-oriented premarital counseling sessions with a priest or rabbi has very little in common with an actual premarital counseling program. If couples are lucky they’ll leave with a couple of worksheets, and a pat on the back from a well meaning pastor. What’s the problem? Your priest is not a marriage and family therapist. He (likely) sincerely believes that the path to a happy healthy marriage is to be religious together, and his job is to help you to do that. While spirituality is a is beautiful and important part of family life, having a really fantastic, enjoyable and successful relationship is a little more involved.

High quality premarital counseling actually teaches you how to do several important things that will protect your marriage from harm, and keep your love strong through the years. A good premarital program should teach you:

  1. How to show each other love and respect, even when (or especially when) things are challenging.
  2. How to communicate with each other.
  3. How to handle inevitable conflict productively.
  4. How to keep your relationship interesting and passionate.
  5. How to get on the same page around important issues like parenting, money, priorities and more.
  6. How to support each others hopes and dreams — both as a couple, and as individuals.

Pastoral premarital counseling, well intended as it is, just doesn’t go that deeply into teaching you the skills for making all that happen. We do. We have many opportunities for you to do premarital counseling with us, including our Lifetime of Love premarital class, our “I DO!” premarital program, and private premarital counseling

I hope you take advantage of at least one of them.

With love and respect,

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, PhD, LMFT, BCC



No, premarital counseling is not a requirement to get married, and it’s an easy to prioritize other expenses instead. However, just like what happens when you disregard other essentials (exercise, nutrition, sleep) the consequences caused by not investing in premarital education are much harder and more expensive to treat than they are to prevent…. Read more


The cost of high-quality premarital counseling can vary depending on who you see, how many sessions you require, and the format you choose. If you’re on a budget and looking for basic instruction on communication skills, getting on the same page around finances, priorities, etc. you may consider a class format. Classes tend to be most affordable and usually cost around…. Read more


Online premarital counseling can be very effective and helpful for many couples. This is especially true for long-distance couples, couples in rural areas, couples who travel, and very busy professionals who would find it difficult (or impossible) to attend sessions otherwise. However, there are situations where online premarital counseling may not be a good idea… Read more


Good, evidence based premarital counseling generally starts with an assessment. There are various ways to do this. Sometimes you’ll take an online quiz to determine your strengths and growth areas. Some premarital counselors prefer to interview you both to get an idea of your strengths and opportunities. Once that is mapped out…. Read more

Meet Our Team

Of Premarital Counseling Experts

Jessica Small, M.A., LMFT

Jessica Small is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist premarital counselor with years of experience in helping couples identify their strengths, pinpoint potential problem areas, and resolve issues before they start. She leads our “I DO!” premarital program.

Meagan Terry, M.A., LMFT

Meagan Terry is a Licensed Marriage and Family therapist, and a relationship expert. She specializes in helping couples communicate, keep their love strong, and create healthy, happy families. She teaches our “Lifetime of Love” premarital and relationship class.

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Brenda Fahn, M.A., LMFT

Brenda Fahn is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 15 years of experience in helping couples and families thrive. She is a certified Prepare-Enrich premarital counselor, and also teaches our “Lifetime of Love” premarital and relationship class.

Best Yet? We’re Easy To Work With.

We’re Convenient

  • Day, evening & weekend appointments.
  • We have convenient office locations across the Denver Metro area in Denver / Cherry Creek, Broomfield, and Denver Tech Center.
  • Travel? Busy schedule?  We offer online premarital counseling too.
  • Easy online scheduling, or call our 24/7 receptionist for live help.


We’re Affordable

  • Our effective approach gets you results in fewer sessions
  • Our rates are reasonable, and we have sliding scale options
  • We offer cost-effective classes, or structured programs
Tammy Gaiter

Tammy Gaiter

Client Services Team

More Questions? Call Anytime.

If you have more questions about premarital counseling at Growing Self, would like to get matched with a premarital counselor, or would like help enrolling in one of our premarital counseling programs, call anytime.

Call or email to connect with our caring client services team. We answer 24/7.

Meet Our Team

We Are Relationship Experts
Growing Self Counseling & Coaching
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